Talked to my oncologist this morning and it’s as I suspected. The cancer is growing. He say the tumour in my pelvis has grown, my T8 is compressing and he’s afraid it might fracture. There’s some in my ribs. There’s a couple in my lungs they’re still watching. He says my bones are “riddled “ with lesions. Nothing in my head yet, thank goodness. It all explains why I’ve been so tired and in more pain lately. The validation makes me feel better for feeling worse.

Sounds like the radiation scheduled for August 3rd will only be one treatment, for pain management. He says he’s going to text the radiologist to include the T8 and to request only one treatment. It’s too far away for a daily drive and too difficult and expensive to have to stay there longer.

He says that in 3 or 4 months, after I’ve been on Xoleda for a bit, I should feel better and have more energy. I sure hope so. It seems like I’m running out of spoons more often than not lately.

The cancer clinic here has called me twice, letting me know I’m on their radar and they’re just waiting on the oncologist and radiologist for the go ahead to start my Xoleda treatment. Looks like that’ll start the week after radiation.

I’ve gotten past the fear of living with terminal cancer. Now it just really sucks.

The oncologist wasn’t kidding when he said things were going to happen fast.

As with the bone scan, the CT took two tries to get the line in 😦

I feel like I did when I was first diagnosed.

My friend has been visiting this week which is the only bright spot. Like old times with him here to take me to all my appointments. He also gets to see the beautiful place I live. The neighbor fed the eagles with fish parts again this morning. It is awesome to watch the bald eagles feed.

New oncologist wasn’t kidding when he said he wanted my scans to happen as soon as possible.

Had the bone scan yesterday and as is the normal for me, they couldn’t find a vein the first try. Had to redo the injection dosage because “there was too much blood in the needle”. Second try worked. It does make for a really long day when you have to sit around and wait for a couple of hours after the injection, especially when this is all being done in another town about 30-45 minutes away.

I couldn’t see the monitor for the scan as well as I could the first time so not sure where the cancer is for sure, but my pelvis was noticable. I’ll find out in a couple of weeks, after my CT, and after they’ve compared the two scans.

I finally took another pain pill last night about 1 am. 3 weeks of constant pain and no sleep and I just couldn’t take it any more. I’ve taken more of them so far this year than I had hoped to but logic is starting to win out. There’s no reason to force myself to put up with the pain when I have some relief readily available, even if it does make me feel a little loopy.

All of this sure brings up the anxiety level. I’m in between treatments and they’re trying to get the second line of treatment going. New side effects(soon), new doctors, new hospitals, new home, more pain, scans. Good thing my new home calms me down, what with the sea air and the sound of the ocean waves. If I still lived in Maple Ridge I’d be more out of sorts than I am.

Saw my new oncologist today. He happens to be related to a family friend which puts a twist on things.

He’s taken me off Ibrance but keeping me on Letrozole and is putting me on Capecitabine(Xeloda) in a couple of weeks. He’s also scheduling a CT and bone scan in a week or two. He’s putting a rush on them. Depending on what they show, I may be in for more radiation too for pain management. The scans can be done here but the radiation has to be done in Victoria 😦

Really tired after going to Victoria and back in one day even though I wasn’t the one driving. Little leery of new side effects but whatever. This is really nothing new, just a different oral chemo drug. I’m sure I’ll get used to a new normal. Again.

For the last couple of weeks, my hip has been sore 24/7. I at first attributed it to a flare-up from moving and unpacking.. I get those occasionally when I over-excert myself so I wasn’t too concerned. Right now I’m using a cane again when I leave the house. I haven’t been taking pain pills because the pain is still at the tolerable stage. This is all incredibly tiring and depressing. and it’s been too long for this to be considered just another flare-up.

To make matters worse, I took my cat(Grady) out on his leash the other night, like I do most nights. He enjoys it and oftens asks to go. That night the neighbor’s dog, a German Shepard cross, charged my cat. A growling match ensued(yes, Grady prefers to growl instead of hiss) with some swipes and lunges. Then there’s me, trying to get Grady off the ground where he’d be safe. It was only a few seconds of high stress and extreme fear and me forgetting to take it easy for my hip to start screaming at me. I did take a pain pill as soon as we made it back to my rooms. Haven’t had that kind of pain for a couple of years.

Monday I meet my new oncologist. It’s going to be a long uncomfortable trip but I’m anxious to hear what my next steps are especially with my hip hurting again.