Saw the GPO yesterday. Because my fingernails are loosening from their nail beds, I’m considered a “level 3” for side effects. He called it a “residual effect” from the IV chemo I had years ago. I was given the option of 2 weeks on, one week off with a lowered dosage or 1 week on, 1 week off with my current dose. I’m taking the 7/7. I am so not a breakfast person!

I got emotional when I was talking to him. Sometimes I’m just overwhelmed by all this and am just exhausted trying to keep my thoughts positive. I just want to be able to forget. Then I get pissed at myself for being “weak”. He said it’s “completely understandable “ to feel this way, that I’m being constantly reminded of my diagnosis through side effects and appointments and drugs.

I have a bone scan on the 6th and an oncology phone appointment on the 12th. My dosage will be part of the discussion with him.

I’ve decided to take a break from this drug. With my fingernails lifting and the tips of my fingers going numb, to all the other side effects I have, I just need a break. My bloodwork is “stable” and my cancer antigens are still within the 30-50 range where they’ve been for months so I should be ok. Not sure if it’ll be one week or 2 but we’ll see. The GPO also says we can drop the dosage again or change the cycle, one week on, one week off. My appointment next week is in person. I guess they want to see my hands and feet rather than classifying me as a “level two” on my say so.

Also got a call from the Victoria clinic. He saw I’d had a CT and was concerned that no one had gone over the results with me. No problemo. I can interpret them myself. He reminded me that last time my CT was fine but my bone scan showed uptake so we will just see what it shows before I can breathe again. Yet another oncologist will be calling me in July to follow up.

I sometimes wonder how I’m supposed to feel normal when I don’t feel normal….I just feel overwhelmed. Sometimes it’s just all too much.

Saw my results of the CT scan I had on the 3rd. There’s no changes from my scan in March.

Here’s the lowdown on the metastasis that I have.

Right glenoid lytic lesion – right scapula

Depending on how you look at it, it’s all good when there’s no changes. “Stable” as the professionals like to say.

I have encountered a new side effect of Capecitabine. A couple of my nails are lifting off the nail bed. Slightly traumatic for me. It happened with the IV chemo I had so many years ago to. I’ll ask my GPO about it on Tuesday. Right now I’m trying to ignore it….