Had my bloodwork Monday. Had my GPO appointment yesterday. So far I’m hanging in there. My bloodwork numbers aren’t the best but not the worst either. She said my bone marrow is tired, very tired. Explains a lot really. I have days where just thinking about doing something like taking out the garbage, cleaning the kitchen or even just having a bath is overwhelming because I know how tired it will make me and I just want to cry.

She is having a baby in April so I’ll be seeing someone else. She also emphasized me asking my oncologist about what happens when my treatment ends. She’s concerned about the aggression my cancer has shown in the past. That conversation will take place in April.

My hip has gotten a bit better. Or I’ve gotten used to the almost constant pain because it’s gone from spiking to a 7 to a constant 3. I did take a pain killer about 2am last night. Haven’t done that in a while but I needed to sleep and the pain was overriding the sleeping pill.

Truthfully, some days I’m just so done with all this that I want to just give up the battle. But I can’t. Not yet. I just tell myself that I still have a ways to go. The cancer isn’t in my organs, just my bones and I don’t need to do anything when I’m fatigued other than to just be.