So I’m still stable. Tumor markers are still at the 60 range. He’s happy that they haven’t started climbing yet. My white blood count is still low. He’s going to hold off doing anther CT until the fall unless my numbers change or I feel like the cancer is creeping again. Another month of Ibrance and Letrozole, here we go!
I know that I get stressed a day or two before I see him. I thought it was flashbacks being in the same room that I had chemo but today I realized that my monthly appointment with him will always be “D Day” for me. I know that at one of these appointments I’m going to hear that these meds aren’t working the way they are supposed to anymore. I struggle with the “fight or flight” instinct and most appointments I have to force myself to go. Although I know this is terminal, there’s always going to be a piece of me that doesn’t want to believe it.