What does that even mean?
This cancer will go away if I think it away?
I won’t die in pain if I think I won’t?
I’ll live a normal, healthy, long life if I think I will?
I can’t think this whole situation away by thinking positive thoughts.
What about thinking real?
Real is I’m in a holding pattern for now. I think I’ll think only of today and what I know is happening.
Real is there is no cure for metastatic cancer, only an opportunity to possibly extend one’s life through drugs and chemicals and radiation that have, in all cases, annoying, and in some cases, deadly side effects. I think I’ll think about what I need to do to take care of myself so these side effects won’t affect my life today.
Real is I’ll have to plan for palliative care instead of planning for my retirement. It may well be a toss up as to which gets me first, the cancer or the side effects cause by the life-extending medications.
Real is thinking of how I am now, in a holding pattern. Real is today the side effects are minimal and I can make it through the day with possibly only feeling fatigued. Real is managing the minor pain I get from sitting too long or standing too long or walking too far. Real is no fractured bones. Real is not feeling incredibly disappointed because thinking positive didn’t take the cancer away.
I think I’ll think real thoughts.