This really isn’t any fun.  Not that I expected it to be but I’m an obsesser.  I am a software tech support person and that’s how I solve the really difficult problems I come across on occasion-by obsessing about them.  By thinking about them, testing out solutions, doodling about them.  Even dreaming about them until I find a solution.  Granted, for the most part I can ask a co-worker and between the 2 of us, we can fix an issue in a matter of minutes but once in a while there’s an issue that no-one has a solution to that needs in depth thinking.   Some people would call it a problem solving skill.  I call it obsessing.  But it ain’t working with cancer.  I’m not getting any solutions.  And no co-worker can help me find one.  I can take the same steps, deal with it like an equation.  A+B =C but no matter how I think on this I can’t come up with ‘C’ except that it stands for cancer.  It doesn’t stand for an answer.  There’s no solution.   And I’m tired of obsessing.  Giving it over to the powers that be and the surgeons is going to happen on Thursday, but I can’t seem to let go until then.  For now I obsess.