I’m first up in the morning, my surgery is at 8am.  I have to be there at 7.  At least no free time to fret like last time.  I’ll be doing that all tonight.  I’m looking for reasons to skip the whole implant thing but that’s all it is, is excuses.  I know I’m doing the right thing by getting a mastectomy on the right side too.  Better now when I can deal with it than later when I might not be able to.  I think I’m  just more apprehensive this time because I know what to expect.  The wanting to throw up when I wake up, the leg thingies that are like casts, the IV and immobility for  a day.  It all sucks but I know the ending will be ok.  I’m only supposed to be in for one night again, hope that’s true.